Friday, October 28, 2011


I Am The "Creepy" Guy!

I recently had the
pleasure of traveling
to Orlando to cover
the opening night
performance of the
Family Force 5
"It's All Gold"
tour at the ultra-hip,
downtown nightspot,
The Social. My official
review is now live

As I stood outside the club, fumbling for my I.D., I noticed that I was getting all sorts of odd looks from the throngs of teenagers standing in line. I quickly recognized these uncomfortable-looking grimaces — I'd noticed them before. Then it dawned on me. Oh no! Say it ain't so! I was immediately hit with a startling revelation. I had become that guy. At (almost) 50, I realized I was now no longer a card-carrying member of the hipster scene. What happened? I used to OWN that bandwagon! Flaunting my unique, fun and fabulous fashion sense and having a lifetime's worth of "insider" show biz experiences, I was (in my mind) still the "cool" guy. But I'd seen this look on too many young faces lately. The verdict was in — I was now officially the "creepy" guy!

See - I'm NOT "creepy!" (Am I?)
We've all seen that guy. He's the one trying to look hip, but (very) clearly hasn't been since probably back in '89. He hangs out at cutting edge, youth-oriented events (typically by himself) — events which he's WAY too old to be attending, but believes that he still fits in — completely oblivious to the fact that teens become disturbed and parents panic and take their children's hands as he approaches.

Yikes! The "creepy" guy? Really? That's not me... right? After all, I was to meet up with my 14-year-old niece, Megan at this show. That would certainly dissuade everyone's anxieties — including the doorman, who also appeared to be creeped-out by my presence. If the perception is that you're somebody's "uncle," then you're "cool" for accompanying a young person to a show. But the longer it took for Megan to arrive at the club, the more dirty looks I received. "Oh hurry up," I said to myself over and over, as I stood waiting outside The Social. Certainly by hanging out together, she'd quickly eliminate my "creepy" factor.

Me and Megan, after the
 Family Force 5 show.
Finally, Megan arrived — just as Family Force 5 was taking the stage. And it was an awesome concert, to be sure. The band rocked, we had a blast, no cops were dispatched and by the end of the night I was back home, cranking up my Foreigner 8-tracks and alphabetizing my Mary-Kate and Ashley video- tape collection. See, I'm not so old or creepy after all!

-Christopher Long
(October 2011)

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